Transcript
One of the things that I think is very important to learn in the message that scripture has to say to us about communication is that the key to being an effective instrument of heart change in the life of another person is to start with your own heart. If it is true -- and it is because the Bible declares to be true that the war of words is really a war for the heart -- then there's never a moment where I don't need to be visiting my motivations. If I have a hard thing to say to you, the Bible says those hard words should be spoken in love.
Speaking Out of Love for God and for You
Now, here's what this means. It means that I'm speaking those words out of love for God and out of love for you. I want God's purposes more than I want my own and I want you to be benefited from what I say. And so, I say tough things to you, things that you may not want to hear, things that may initially hurt you, but I say them in a way that's motivated by love. And because I have that motivation of love, I say those tough things in a way that's loving.
They're still tough. They're still hard to hear, but they're loving. I'm not putting you down. I'm not threatening you. I'm not calling you names, but I'm saying something that's hard for you to hear. The other is true too. If I'm going to say sweet, nice things to you, I better visit my motives because I could be flattering you to get you into the service of me because there's something I want from you.
Now, you could look at a very hard talk where hard things are said and say, "That was God's love being expressed." And you could look at encouraging wonderful things were said and say, "That was an ungodly moment of communication," because that was flattery of another man to get that person into your debt so you could get from them what you want.
Here's what truth and love means. It means that the truth that God wants me to speak to you stays pure because it's not bent and twisted by other motivations of heart, whether those are the anger of man or the fear of man or the selfishness of man or the envy of man or the greed of man. Because I love God and because I love you as I love myself, the words are able to stay pure. The message is able to remain pure. It's not been twisted by other agenda.
