Transcript
So I want to talk to you about marriage and about looking at marriage from the vantage point of the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. And I want to say something that may surprise you, may at first discourage you, but I want to explain. Here it is. Marriage is just disappointing.
Two Sinners in a Broken World
Think about this. You can't have two sinners living together in a dramatically broken world and ever have a relationship free of disappointment. In fact, there's no one you know that has ever had a marriage free of disappointment. In fact, there's no human being who's ever been married that's been free of disappointment.
Here's what this means. Disappointment is not the sign of a bad marriage. Disappointment is the sign of a marriage because a sinner living next to a sinner in a fallen world, there are going to be bumps and bruises and problems along the way.
I think that one of the big deals that gets us in trouble in marriage is unrealistic expectations. Because we don't take seriously what the Bible says about our struggle with sin and because we don't take seriously the reality of the fallen world that we live in, we go into marriage expecting something that we'll never, ever experience.
From Disappointment to Discouragement to Hopelessness
And so, we are hit with disappointment. That disappointment leads to discouragement. That discouragement leads to hopelessness and we wonder if we should have gotten married. We wonder if we should have been married to this person and we're on the pathway to something pretty dark. Maybe that disappointment begins with an argument on your honeymoon or the fact that the other person irritates you or you irritate them or a moment of impatience. You will never have a disappointment-free marriage.
Now, why does that not discourage you? Because the reality is there's nothing that you're encountering in your marriage that is a surprise to your Savior. He knew exactly the environment your marriage would live in. He knew exactly the sin struggle that all of you would have, all of us have, that every married person has.
And He has provided everything we need to have healthy marriage relationships in the middle of the disappointment. The disappointment isn't an end of a good marriage. In fact, it can be the beginning of a good marriage because you quit holding on to unrealistic expectations, you begin to find the grace that you need to face what you need to face in your marriage.
