Paul Tripp: Isn't it amazing to think that some of the hardest moments in all of life are moments of sweet, divine love and grace? Are you able to recognize, in your life, when hardship is actually grace?

Kate Crowley: From Paul Tripp Ministries, this is Right Here, Right Now, connecting the transforming power of Jesus Christ to everyday life. Here, now, is Paul Tripp.

Paul Tripp: Today, I want to tell you the story of Todd. You've met Todd. You've got 'Todds' in your life. Todd was the ultimate planner. He was a little sovereign over his own little world. No, he wasn't aggressively controlling or insensitive to the needs of others. It was just that Todd had a plan, a very clear, prioritized plan. Todd even had his life organized in decades. He reasoned that the first two decades would be for education; the second two decades would be for career and family development; Todd reasoned that the third decade would be for enjoying the returns on the investments he had made in the first few decades. And, the fourth decade would be for rest and retreat. Todd always approached life as a planner. If you would ask Todd about his marriage, he had a plan; ask him about his job, he had a plan; ask him about his house, he had a plan; ask him about his children, he had a plan; ask him about his garden, he had a plan. Ask Todd about anything in his life, he had a plan. Ask him about vacations, diet, leisure, investments, or any other practical life topic, Todd had a plan.

You know, if you would've watched Todd from the outside from a bit of a distance, Todd looked like a good, responsible man who was determined to take life seriously. It didn't look like a bad thing. His planning looked, in fact, like a very good thing. But inside it all, there was something very wrong, and Todd was heading for something that was not in his plan. For all his thoughts, for all his analysis of planning, for all his hard work and discipline, you just would not believe what happened to Todd.

Music: "The Garden" by Five For Fighting

Do you believe in the man in the garden?
Do you believe that he was there?
Now, do you believe in the man in the garden?
Do you believe or do you care?
Did he rise from the ashes and lead the sky above?
Did he lie in the name of love
In the garden

Kate Crowley: This is Right Here, Right Now, and what happens when things don't go as planned? That's coming right up on today's study, "Out of Control" from the series, "May I Speak to the Manager, Please?" by Paul Tripp. Call a friend and remind them that Paul Tripp Ministries can be heard Monday through Friday at 11 A.M. on WFIL. And, if you miss any part of the program, you can also hear Right Here, Right Now later tonight and every evening at 11 P.M. on WFIL.

And while you're listening, we invite you to log on to paultrippministries.org where you can pick up a copy of Paul's book, War of Words and other video, audio, and print resources. That's paultrippministries.org. Right Here, Right Now continues with Paul Tripp.

There Is a Little Bit of Todd in All of Us

Paul Tripp: Permit me to say that I don't think Todd is alone out there. Yes, it's true, there really is a little bit of Todd in all of us. All of us could look forward and consider what we would like our lives to be like. All of us wake up each morning with some kind of plan in our brains. All of us wish, at times, that we were in control of things that are not under our control so we could guarantee the success of our well-thought-out-plan.

Admit it! You do love you, and you do have a wonderful plan for your life. Admit it! You do have moments of concern that God will not endorse your plan. And, you do wonder if you will ever get to enjoy the things you have set your heart on and that you have worked so hard to enjoy.

We all tend to forget that we are not in charge. We do all tend to forget that we are not in charge. And, we do tend to live, ignoring the fact that our story is, in fact, part of a much, much bigger story. And you and I, we tend to get so captivated by the agenda of our own little worlds that we lose sight of anything that is bigger or more significant. Our plan is dominated by what we want and by what we think we need, by our desires, our goals, our thoughts about our own lives.

Think of what captures you the first thing in the morning. Think of what moves you through every day. Think about what you're thinking about as you face the end of the day. Think about what consumes your final thoughts before you go off to sleep.

Yes, it is true that there's a little Todd in each of us. That little Todd in each of us affects the way we look at our marriages; it affects the way we look at parenting; it affects the way we look at relationships with our neighbors. It affects the way we look at our finances; it affects the way we look at the kind of house that we live in, and the kind of car that we would drive, the kind of clothes that we wear, and the kind of food that we eat. We're always looking and evaluating our story. We're always thinking about what's in our lives from the vantage point of how close we are to the plan that we have for what we would like our world to be like. We are little lords. We live like little lords in our own little universes.

Now, maybe you're thinking as I'm saying this, "Well, Paul, I just don't get what's so wrong about the way Todd was living. Todd was just trying to be responsible. He was just taking life seriously. Wouldn't it be better if an awful lot of people would do the same? Paul, I think the world would be much better if there were more 'Todds' around. Are you saying that we shouldn't think ahead, Paul? Are you saying that we shouldn't plan? Are you saying we shouldn't think? Are you saying we shouldn't analyze, and critique, and evaluate? Are you saying we shouldn't strategize? And speaking of Todd, Paul, when are you going to tell us what happened to him?"

Well, you are going to hear more about Todd. I want to tell you Todd's story. I want you to see what happened with hard working Todd. But that will only help you if you understand that there's a little bit of Todd in each one of us.

Music: "Put It In Your Heart" by Bruce Cockburn

As I stare into the flame
Filled up with feelings I can't name
Images of life appear
Regret and anger, love and fear
Dark things drift across the screen
Of mind behind whose veil are seen
Love's ferocious eyes, and clear
The words come flying to my ear
Go on--put it in your heart
Put it in your heart

Todd's Story

Paul Tripp: Well, here's Todd's story. On the surface, things did really look great with Todd. His life really did seem to be in order. Todd was involved with his church about as much as his schedule would allow. He knew his Bible, and he supported his church in all kinds of ways. Todd read lots of good Christian books, occasionally would attend a Christian conference. Todd loved Christian music; that was Todd. And if Todd were your casual acquaintance, you'd probably really look up to him. It seemed like success stuck to Todd like glue. It seemed like there were few decisions that Todd made that weren't the right decisions to make at that time. His personal life, his family, his career all looked to be in order. But inside of Todd's plan, there was some evidence of problems.

Todd had a real problem when people around him messed up. When someone around him would drop the ball, Todd's impatience degenerated into anger very quickly. At home, Todd was a severe disciplinarian with his children, and if the truth were told, his children probably feared Todd more than they respected him. Todd would say that his wife was his best friend, but he seemed more concerned with the orderliness of the house and the schedule than he did with building a relationship of appreciation, love, and tender intimacy with Celia.

Although everyone thought of Todd as a successful businessman, and everyone seemed to admire him for his accomplishments, Todd was not loved at all in his career for his character. And with all these seemingly good things, with all the good things in his life, even when with the bit of trouble that I've just described, Todd had no idea that he was heading for disaster with no seeming recognition that it was happening. Todd was heading for a collision that would forever change his world. Todd's plan was about to blow up, to explode.

It seemed like a typical weekend. Todd was arriving home very late on a Saturday night after one of his high-powered, business weekends. Todd loved those weekends; he loved teaching. He loved mentoring all those junior executives who would show up just to spend the weekend with him. He loved the energy in the room. Todd just loved what he was doing. He had had a great weekend. It had been very successful. He had spent time with these young executives; they had loved what he had said. He felt so alive; he felt so successful.

But for all that success, Todd loved coming home, as well. He loved driving up to the house that he and Celia had designed together. He loved his life. And, he loved driving up with the lights on in the house as they always were when he came home. And, he loved thinking that Celia was in the house waiting for him. He just loved his life.

As Todd drove up his driveway, he noticed something. It seemed odd. It was odd to him that the house was dark. The house was never dark. I mean, come on! Celia knew that he hated to come home to a dark house, and she knew that he always asked her to wait up for him. He wanted her awake. He wanted them to have a few moments together before he would crash into sleep after an exhausting weekend.

He thought as he drove toward the garage, "Maybe she was just exhausted and had fallen asleep in the chair somewhere." Todd got out of his car, shut the garage door, walked to the house and fumbled with his keys to let himself in, fumbled with the light switch as he stepped in and began to call Celia, but there was no answer.

He tried the intercom that was right next to the door, but no one answered. He was about to throw his keys into the blue bowl on the table by the door, when he noticed that there was an envelope sitting next to the bowl on the table.

Immediately Todd was irritated. "She's writing me a note?" he thought. "If she couldn't get me on my cell, why didn't she just leave a voice message? If she had something to do and was getting in late, that's fine, but, hey, a note?"

But the note was very different than anything Todd would've ever anticipated. It was from Celia, but it was a note that was about to change Todd's life in ways that he just wouldn't believe. In it, Celia told Todd of years of dissatisfaction with their marriage, dissatisfaction with his selfishness, his demands, his criticism and his irritation, and his often explosive anger. She told him how he had made the entire family slaves to his agenda. She told him that he needed to get some help, and she would come back when he did.

Immediately, Todd was filled with a combination of fear and fury. He felt like he was in the middle of a nightmare, but he knew he was awake. "All I did was try to make a nice life for my family," he told himself. "All I did was work hard and teach my children to do the same. Celia had nothing when she met me," he said, as he collapsed into that red chair in the breakfast room where he sat each morning and read the Wall Street Journal. There was no way he was going to go crawling for forgiveness. He hadn't done anything wrong; he hadn't had any affairs, for pete's sake. There are many women who'd love to be married to a man like him. He hadn't forsaken his faith. He had trained his kids very well and worked hard so that each of them would be getting a good start. "Selfish?" he thought, "Well, I've given away much of what I've earned."

He got up and trudged his way to the bedroom; he couldn't believe that he was all alone there by himself. He looked at that big, king-size bed, and it made him angry because he knew he'd be sleeping in it alone for the first time in many, many, many years. He pulled up the covers. He turned off the light, and he proceeded to try to get some sleep, even though he knew it would be hard, and even though he had no idea what the next day would bring.

As he went off to sleep, he just kept saying to himself, "I can't believe it. I can't believe it. I just can't believe it. I've worked for this? I haven't done one thing wrong." All of a sudden with one brief note, Todd's whole plan had come completely unglued. Angry and alone, all by himself, Todd simply didn't get it. He didn't understand why this had happened to him, and he surely had no idea what to do next.

Music: "You Are God"

Creator of all things, Healer of my being
Through your righteousness, I've been redeemed
Forgiven by your grace, Your joy is my strength
When everything has changed, You stay the same
You are God, bright and Morning Star
When I'm down, You lift me up
You're the lover of my heart, You are God
Mender of my soul, You're the rain that makes me whole
You are God

Why Todd's Story Matters for You

Paul Tripp: Now, why have I taken so much time to tell you Todd's story? Well, remember this. Todd's story is important for us because there really is a little bit of Todd in each of us. It was not surprising the Todd woke up angry the next morning. But now, Todd wasn't angry at Celia, not just Celia. No! Todd was angry at God. For the first time in his life, for the first time he could ever remember, Todd was consciously angry at God. "Is this what I signed up for when I decided to follow You?" he thought. "I'm one of the good guys. What did I do that was so bad to deserve this?"

Todd didn't go to church on Sunday. He just couldn't get himself there. He just didn't want to be there. He couldn't imagine singing those hymns when this is what happened to him. "Great is thy faithfulness! Yeah, right! I'm one of the good guys," he thought. "What could I have possibly done that was so bad to deserve this?"

Todd didn't go to church on Sunday and called in sick on Monday. He spent the next two days in spitting rage. This simply was not part of the plan. This should have never happened. "All the hard work I did--was it for this? I wish I would've known, I wouldn't have worked so hard," he told himself. And for all of his trying, Todd was unable to make contact with Celia. It drove him crazy that he had no idea where she was.

Over the next several weeks, things didn't get better for Todd. Todd's anger and bitterness grew, and that anger and bitterness spilled over into his work. It affected his relationships with the people there. It affected his performance there. It affected the way he approached his duties there and his customers there.

Before long, Todd was approached by his CEO and told to take a leave of absence. That first day off work was torture for Todd. By the end of the second day, not knowing what else to do, he had contacted his pastor. What had gone so wrong? Why did this thing explode the way it did?

Now, think about this. If Todd were your friend, what would you say to him? How would you try to help him? What were the ingredients that led Todd to that dark house and that fateful note on Saturday night? What was wrong with Todd's life? What was wrong with Todd's faith? What was wrong with Todd? And could it be, that in some way, that what was wrong with Todd is wrong with you as well?

Todd is in the middle of his own story, and he is screaming, "May I speak with the manager, please? This is just not supposed to happen." Todd is angry and afraid. He can't believe what has happened. What about you?

(Music Interlude)

Paul Tripp: Well, I want you to listen to what I'm about to say. I know this will not make sense to some of you. I know that on first hearing, some of you will have no idea why I am saying what I'm about to say, but here it is. "You do not understand what is going on with Todd unless you realize that on that life changing Saturday night, what Todd was not getting was condemnation. No! What he was getting was love." Now, I just have to repeat that to you again. Here it is: You do not understand, and you will not understand what is going on with Todd unless you realize, that on that life changing Saturday night, what Todd was getting was not condemnation. No! What he was getting was love. That evening was not about God turning His back on this driven man. That evening was not about God being insensitive, unfaithful, or unloving. No! Rather, on that unthinkable evening, Todd was getting grace, but it didn't look like grace to Todd. It didn't feel like grace, but that's exactly what it was. Rather than turning His back on this controlling man, rather than walking away from him, God was wrapping arms of love around Todd. In a crushing moment of love and grace, Todd's plan had collided with God's plan. And when that happens, there's a whole lot of carnage.

Isn't it amazing to think that some of the hardest moments in all of life, are at the very same time, moments of sweet, divine love and grace? Are you able to recognize in your life when hardship is actually grace?

Kate Crowley: "Finding God in the Midst of Heartache," Paul Tripp and the grace of God from the series, "May I Speak to the Manager, Please?" and today's lesson, "Out of Control." Be sure to tune in tomorrow for more from Paul. Today, Paul looked at the flip side of trials and the hand of God in the midst of our struggles.

If you'd like to hear these words again or you'd like to share them with someone who could use some encouragement right now, order the CD's on line as well as other helpful resources. That's at paultrippministries.org. While you're there, check out War of Words. This book, by Paul Tripp, describes four fundamental, life-altering principles that can revolutionize your life. That's War of Words, available at our website, paultrippministries.org, all one word, spelled T-R-I-P-P, paultrippministries.org.

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Now, Paul would love to come to your church or special event is a guest speaker. Just go online for more information. And, next time we're together, Paul continues his emphasis on trusting God from his new series, "May I Speak to the Manager, Please?" For Paul Tripp and all of us at Paul Tripp Ministries, I'm Kate Crowley, reminding you that, in Jesus Christ, there really is help, right here, right now. See you tomorrow.